It All Started with a Giraffe...

New Holiday Tethers!

2011-10-03T15:25:00.000-07:00

I posted some new Halo Tethers today.

I have two Halloween tethers and one Christmas Tartan tether. I just love tartan for Christmas.

Will look great on that holiday baby who is ready for a party!

Check these out.

www.charmingcarriage.com

My Lizzy at Two Years Old

2011-09-28T15:22:00.000-07:00

Her favorite food is banana and peanut butter.

She likes for me to put her blanket on her back and say “nite nite” and then she pops back up and laughs.

She can’t go to bed without her Bear, Nite Nite Bunny and Pig.

When she can’t find Daisy she says, “where Daisy go?” and puts her hands up in the air.

She loves fruit snacks! Can’t get enough of them.

When she is doing a trick, like jumping off a step or running back and forth she starts by first saying, “7 7 2”. At least I think that’s what she says, it’s still under review.

She likes to make silly faces, wink her eye and make an angry face for the camera.

She tickles the backs of my legs when she is standing behind me at the sink.

She is going to be a computer pro by age 5.

She says “Hi”, “hmmm, and Bye” into the phone.

Grandpa is “pawpaw”, Grandma is “ma”, G-Dad” is “Dad” and Grammy is “Gabby”

Her hair smells like outside after school.

She smiles when I wake her up in the morning and always says “Mommmmeee” when she sees my face.

Her favorite words are “Mommy, Daddy, Mommy, Daddy”.

But my heart melts when she says, “Momma”.

She is a sucker for the swings and slides and can do the slide all by herself.

She laughs the hardest when her Daddy is being silly.

And she cries for no reason except I think she just loves me so much she can’t stand it. :-P

It got away from me...

2011-09-20T11:40:00.000-07:00

The last year has flown by, so much so that I forgot about my blog. Not that it surprises me. I am the Queen of Procrastination. I also live with the King too, so that should tell you a lot. Not only did I not get around to my blog, I also did not get around to all things involving babies like, baby book, photo albums, saving her old clothes and little items in a tight waterproof safe so one day she can look back fondly on her childhood and thank me for not letting her things burn to ash or float to sea.

I'm sure that is exactly what she is thinking right this minute.

A lot has happened since the last post.

I lost 20 lbs, Elizabeth started daycare, she walked and talked (and hasn't stopped since), and she turned 2 this past week. Oh, did I mention I gained about 5lbs back. But enough about me.

Me and the hubs also started a little business of our own called Charming Carriage.
www.charmingcarriage.com

It has been quite a learning experience starting a small business. We have so many ideas and little time to work on them. Our full-time jobs, baby and family take up a lot of our time. But with a little hard work, and some To-Do lists, I know we can make it happen eventually.

In the meantime I'll let you go to our website...it's an Etsy site for the moment, but we have plans to have our own site soon and more posts of new handmade baby gear.

Until I post again...which could be minutes from now.

A week to a Year Old!

2010-09-07T11:20:00.000-07:00

9 Months and 3 Weeks!

2010-06-29T15:48:00.000-07:00

Where have I been? My baby is growing up and I haven't been keeping my little blog up to date. You are playing and standing and laughing and getting more teeth and crawling faster than a speeding bullet!

And had your first Father's Day too!! We went to Brenham and celebrated with the 3rd annual Orrlympics! You didn't get to play any games but you did have a good time in the hippo pool that Grammy and Grandad Orr got for you.

Happy Father's Day Daddy! Go for the GOLD!!

Like father, like daughter.

You help me put away your toys, you love your phone rattle and laugh every time I put it to my ear and "Hi!", you have mastered your stacking rings, you would rather crawl on me on the floor than play with any cool toy you have, you make circles around the coffee table and you rarely ever fall down, you laugh when the dog licks your face and can't stop grabbing her ears, you love music and now bounce and clap when we have our dance and sing hour, you really like Yo Gabba Gabba (which I turn on when I need a break), you clap when we say "Yaay!", you give us kisses when we say "Kisses!", and still love to snuggle before bed with me and your snuggle blanket.

Yaay teeth!

Yesterday I called you my angel baby and told you I was so happy to be your Momma. You smiled and I think you understood me because you hugged my neck and patted my back. and I hugged you and patted your back. A ritual we do every morning when I get you out of bed. I love that hug. and I love you.

~ Momma

Month 8

2010-05-14T19:17:00.000-07:00

Remember how I said you did something on the exact day you turned a new month?

Well, Monday, May 10, you turned 8 months old. And you pulled yourself up on your feet! On the ottoman! Twice!

Whatever! You are a genius.

Thoughts

2010-05-13T11:33:00.001-07:00

I was just holding Elizabeth, she had fallen asleep on my chest. Little tiny breaths in and out hot on my neck. and I started to miss her. I miss her warm head and tummy laying across my chest. I miss her little frog legs all bunched up and cozied on my tummy. I want to know if all Moms miss these days when their children grow up. I don't ever want to forget this feeling. I don't want her to get too big for me to cuddle her up. But I want to see the next day, the next month and the next year. I can't wait for her to talk and walk with me, draw me pictures and tell me she loves her Mommy and Daddy, play with the dogs and learn how to swim. But right now I want to hold her forever. Sometimes I have a hard time putting her in her bed or lying her down for a nap. I just want to take it all in just a little bit longer. What will I do when she is too big for this?

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-12T05:42:00.000-07:00

What a wonderful weekend with my sweet angel and hubby. I have been looking forward to Mother's Day for awhile. Not like it is the only time of the year I get to spend quality time with Elizabeth, I get to do that everyday, but I was excited to be a Momma on this Mother's Day. We have spent all our lives celebrating our Moms and it was now my day to be a Momma. And I am so glad that I get to be a part of that club.

Saturday was spent getting a massage, make that a hot stone massage, eating the tastiest pizza and wine in the Woodlands, and going grocery shopping for our picnic foods for Mother's Day. The weekend was not particularly pretty out, but Elizabeth more than made up for that with her smiles and laughs and everyone who saw her giggles and tells us how beautiful she is.
Sunday we got up and went to Church. I wanted to pray for my angel and me. God has been so good to us, giving us little E, keeping us safe and watching over us. I want Him to help me be the best Mother and Wife I can be. It was a great Mass, even got to see 2 baptisms, which I thought was quite a special Mother's Day gift for those women.
Next we left for the nearest Arboretum with Elizabeth's grandparents, drank wine and had some snacks. It was a nice day out, not hot but pleasant and she was content to sit in her stroller and listen to us chat and try and blow bubbles her way (note to self...don't buy cheap bubbles).

The only thing I regret is not getting any pictures of me and her together. Wanted to post one of us all dressed up in our Mother's Day attire. Busy morning for me on this 1st Mother's Day. But I guess I will more than make up for that in the years to come.

She has changed my life, changed the way I feel about my own Mother, she is making me a better Christian and helping me to enjoy all the little things in life. The "stop and smell the roses" quote runs through my head a lot since she got here.

Monday, May 11, 2010 Elizabeth turned 8 months old. She pulled herself up for the first time. I didn't even have to help her. One more thing she doesn't need her Momma for. One more step closer to being independent, but it was (watch out, it's about to be a cheesy moment)one more step closer into my heart.

"Making a decision to have a child--it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." - Elizabeth Stone

7 Months

2010-04-14T12:34:00.001-07:00

7 months. Wow, I can’t believe it. You were just 6 months 4 weeks ago and now 7 months? Hmm. I don’t know if I like that very much. Why won’t you just stay little?

In month 6 you perfected sitting. You sit so well, you hardly ever fall over. And when you do, you mosey over to the toy you fell on like you meant to do that.

In month 6 you perfected the tummy spin. This involves you on your tummy and using your hands and knees to spin in a circle. I had you up on the bed yesterday and you did like 2 full circles all while babbling on about not wanting to take a nap. You are ridiculous. Ridiculously cute.

In month 6 you spoke a sound. “Ba ba ba” That’s all. And I cried and thought it was the most wonderful “ba” I had ever heard. And then I started whispering “ma ma ma” to you and I do it everyday A LOT. But you just smile and think about saying it and don’t. I think you already know how but are teasing me and waiting for the perfect moment.

In month 6 your legs grew longer, your cheeks grew fatter and that 2^nd tooth finally came in.

You lay in my arms at night, snuggle in for bed and I feel how heavy you are. I think about all the times I held you when you were a brand new baby and how you felt on my shoulder, next to my cheek so tiny. I kiss your face, whisper a prayer in your ear and wish you sweet dreams before I lay you down.

Now it’s month 7! And month 7 is going to bring us even more insight into your personality. Yesterday you got up on your knees a bit. I see it happening. You are about to take off! If you can just push your chest up with your hands you will be on your way to crawling. Each month, the exact day you turn a new month, you do something new. First tooth at 5 months. Sitting at 6 months. And now on your knees at 7 months. I can’t wait till month 8!

We celebrated your 6 months by getting your picture taken. Elizabeth, you won’t believe me but you are absolutely breath taking. You had me and Daddy singing and dancing and clapping and ball bouncing to get you to smile and laugh and you went right along with it. You were a perfect angel, bare butted and such a doll in tutus, pearls, ruffle pants, and flower hats. I saw the pictures and I cried. I see you getting bigger and more beautiful every day. It hurts my heart, but in a good way.

http://www.mulberrydreams.com/

I love you. Momma

Thinking of you...

2010-03-31T12:47:00.000-07:00

Miss E, today I am thinking of you. It's not unusual for me to do this all day. The two days I'm at work during the week all I do is think of you. Your pictures are everywhere and I'm reminded every minute just how lucky I am to have you. I sit at my desk and try to remember each and every face you make. I want to go back in time and relive those first weeks with you. I'm starting to forget and it makes me sad. I wish I could record each and every smile, cry and laugh. Every nap that followed a snuggle. Every scream in excitement followed by a smile.

We took you to see the bluebonnets this past week and let me tell you. You made the WalMart parking lot the most beautiful spot on the planet that day. You studied those flowers and even tried to eat some. You laughed and smiled at us. Such an angel. I want to tell you that you have filled my heart with such joy and I don't know how I managed this long without you. It's been a long 32 years but you have finally given me clarity. I get it. You are all I need.

Along with Daddy...I'll keep him too.

Vote for me!

2010-03-24T06:17:00.001-07:00

Vote for me in this contest!

Contest details

6 months ago....

2010-03-16T10:09:00.000-07:00

6 months ago a sweet angel baby was born. She was 8lbs 9 oz and 20 inches long. She had light brown hair and dark eyes. She was beautiful. I couldn't wait to hold her and when I did, I couldn't stop crying. She was everything I ever wanted and more!

I remember being in the delivery room when she was born, touching her for about 30 seconds before they whisked her off me because they were concerned about meconium intake possibly. All was well, but those few minutes I just stared at the baby bed, I couldn't see her because the nurses were in my way. Wilson was crying and taking pictures and video and no one would tell me if she was alright. Finally Wilson looked at me and told me she was perfect.
Le sigh.
Then in a flash everyone left me. The doctor sewed me up, the nurses left with the baby along with my husband and I sat alone in that delivery room for about 30 minutes. Those were the longest minutes of my life. I mostly thought about where she was, what were they doing, how I wished I could see her, watch her get her first bath, stand next to her and talk to her and tell her she was ok and hold her hand. I thought about the delivery, how long it was, but how I felt no pain and didn't really remember some things about it. I felt alone, cold and tired and bit shaken up I guess. It was scary. The party had moved outside and no one let me go. Hey, I did all that pushing and got her here, why can't I come too?
Finally the doc came back in, surprised the nurses hadn't shown up to take care of me and he ran out to get one. She came quick and pulled all the iv's and tape off me. I think that hurt worse than the delivery, the tape used to tape all my iv's and epidural in.

Then Mom showed up and I felt much better. Moms can do that. Mom was in my room when Elizabeth was born, but she didn't get to stand near me like Wilson. The delivery room was small, not a lot of room to have 2 people stand by you. I wished I could have held her hand some too. She was there when I was born, and I was so honored for her to be there when her grand baby was born. Like a passing of the torch feeling. :-) She was about as tired as I was, having been there at our house for a few weeks helping me clean and get organized for the baby. She is a saint my Mom. She gets me focused when I don't want to be. If I didn't have my Mom I don't know how I would have turned out. I know she will always be there for me for motherly advice and to be my friend.

Back to my story... I got to get out of my bed and was rolled down to my new room. Some friends had come, Emily and Josh. It was late, at least 10pm and I was so surprised to see them there. They followed me to my room and sat with me for awhile and chatted about the delivery and said nothing but wonderful things about our daughter.
2 hours later and still no baby. My blood pressure was very high and our friends were told to leave so I could rest. We said our goodbyes and I closed my eyes in the dark room. It was cold and I was comfortable, but something was missing. Oh, my husband and my baby girl.

Finally Wilson showed up (he was taking pics of Elizabeth in her "holding station" hehe...)and we sat awhile waiting for Elizabeth. She was soon wheeled to our room and I got to hold her, immediately that pressure went down. It was a funny feeling holding her for the first time. I mean I felt like I knew her, her little habits already, but she was also so new to me, like a stranger. It's hard to explain. But I knew I loved her more than life. We mostly watched her all night and the next few days were a mess. I cried, I cried and I cried. Oh Lord how I cried at nothing and cried at everything. Wilson was the perfect husband. He is so comforting and I don't know if I ever thanked him for being there for me. Thank you baby.

I really feel bad for women out there who do not have supportive partners or partners at all. I don't know how I could have gotten through the first 4 weeks of her life without him. I know I have family who is always there for me, but there is something about having a husband who is caring and understanding of how you feel. And if he didn't understand, he did a good job of just listening and being there. :-)

Here are a few things I remember about her first 6 months of life.

1. That cry! Oh how I miss her newborn cry. I never wanted her to cry of course, but to hear it now would make me so happy. It was the sweetest most wonderful cry I ever heard. I could pick her out of a crowd of babies.

2. The swaddle. One of our first shopping trips out of the house with Elizabeth was to buy a Swaddle blanket at BRUS. This was very important to us as we needed sleep and so did she. I think the minute we got home with it we swaddled and slept. But it only worked as long as she kept her arms in which lasted till she was about 2 months. These new fangled swaddle blankets with velcro are a must have. I hear they now make one that has a zipper which is better than the velcro called the Woombie or something. Looks like a little straight jacket (which I sometimes felt bad looking at her in it with her tiny bebe head sticking out) but I had to remember she had absolutely no room in the womb to move so she was used to it. I hear some peeps swaddle up till 8 months or so. Now that is weird. I think there comes a time when a baby needs to learn to sleep without "womb-like" assistance. Arms all akimbo and relaxed in her bed.

3. Momma cried. A LOT. I knew I would get some sort of blues but I wasn't sure what I would cry about. Would I cry about being tired and wanting sleep, would I cry because I didn't know why she was crying, or because I was frustrated as to what to do with a baby? No. I mostly cried because I loved her more than words could express. All I had to do was look at her and I would melt. Still do. I couldn't believe I was looking at the baby that was kicking and hiccuping around in there for 9 months. It's still hard to imagine she came from me. God is amazing.
But I did cry out of frustration a lot. She wasn't breastfeeding well, I felt sad that I couldn't give that to her in full. I felt like if I didn't breastfeed I would miss out on some bonding experience. But that is not true. You don't need to breastfeed to bond and I was foolish to think so. You know what, I wasn't foolish, I was just new to it all and now that I know, maybe next time around I won't be so hard on myself, more relaxed and maybe it will work...or not...and I'm ok with that. I just wanted her to be happy, full and satisfied and when I was told I wasn't doing that, I felt inadequate. Good thing I had my hubby there to support me and tell me that I was being a great Mom and that our little girl was healthy and happy.

4. Those baby hands. Elizabeth would lay her hands on her tummy on top of each other when she slept in my arms. It was almost as if that was what she was used to while in my tummy. She looked peaceful and prayerful, like a true angel.

5. "Song Hour" Everyday at 4pm we sat on the couch and sang songs. Mostly Sarah McLachlan. She was smiling at 3 weeks and she was a perfectly quiet baby during "Song Hour". I would feed her and sing to her and she just watched my mouth move and smile. Oh what a joy it was to see her smile. I think I need to start up "Song Hour" again. and she loved to dance too. Dancing, waiting for Daddy to get home for kisses.

6. Her new baby smell. It smelled like milk, powder and sweet baby girl. It was the best smell ever and I will always remember it. I imagine heaven smells like new baby.

7. Her baby nicknames: Snuggalee Baby, Angel Baby, Baby Girl, Bubble Lips.

8. Her bassinet...Was my bassinet, my mother's and my brother and sister's when we were all babies. It's been passed down to all the babies and will be passed down for all the future babies in the family. My sister fixed a sweet eyelet cover for it and she's had it since her girls were born. I was so excited when I got to borrow it for Elizabeth. I pictured Elizabeth in it and I couldn't wait to lay her down in the bassinet for her first nap. It was the first thing I did when I got her home.

Her first picture at home in the bassinet. 2 days old.

The first thing she did was curl her legs up and wait for us to snap this picture. Just look at those frog legs! Oh, but she moved out of that bassinet quickly. and I shed some tears. and Wilson told me it was going to be ok. She moved from the bassinet beside my bed, to the portable bed in front of my feet. About 5 feet away from me. But it was 5 feet too long for Momma and I couldn't see or hear her and I couldn't put my hand on hers while we slept. Sometimes all it took was a touch from Momma to help her quiet down, and I was going to miss that. For all the times I was tired those first few months and all the times I didn't want to get up to feed her because I thought I would die from lack of sleep, I would do it again in a heartbeat just to snuggle her and hold her hand and help her fall back asleep. Momma was there for her and now Momma was far away.

9. Hello new teeth! She got her first tooth on Valentine's Day. I will always remember Valentine's Day as the day I got my first period and now the day my daughter sprouted her first tooth. Weird. But it is exciting. and I love feeding her cereal and veggies. She makes the darndest faces while she eats and loves to watch TV, like her Mommy and Daddy, while she eats her meals. That's probably not a good thing and maybe next feeding we will listen to music and chat. I'm excited to watch her grow up, learn to eat new foods and I can't wait for the days we sit at our kitchen table, eat dinner and talk about our day as a family. I saw one family on TV that had a ritual at every meal. Each child would say what they didn't like about their day and then what they loved about their day. I can't wait to ask Elizabeth that.

10. The crib and her room. So I told my husband I wanted to try and get Elizabeth to start sleeping in her room back in January or February. I struggled with it. She was only 4 months old and still sleeping in our room. Her room was upstairs and felt like the other side of the world to me. Once again, I had to let her go and I wasn't ready. She needed us close by. What if she cried out and I didn't hear her? It was going to take me longer to get to her. It was comforting to have us all in one room, one big family. She was close, Wilson was there and Momma was happy. I teared up every time I thought about moving her to her room.
But I had to let go. and so I did. I fed her, rocked her to sleep and walked upstairs. Gave her a kiss and called for Wilson to help me set up the monitor. I tried to not think about it. As I left her room I grabbed up some new clothes from her closet...she was getting bigger and her little onesies weren't fitting anymore. I sat on my bed and sorted her new clothes. and finally let go with tears. Once again Wilson told me she was ok, and not far away and I watched her monitor and she was happily asleep. How in the world can she be happy away from me? hehe... But she is, she's a big girl and Momma needs to relax. Which is exactly what I did. I turned on my TV, folded laundry and finally relaxed in my room. It was a good night and for the most part she slept well. Has only woken up a few times, I'm sure due to her teeth, and now sleeps most all night in her bed.

It sure is hard to let them grow up. Now I understand and I will always have trouble letting her grow up, but I will let her and hope she will one day feel these same things too if she has children. It's a feeling like no other.

Happy 6 months Baby Girl! I love you forever.

Love, Momma

Midnight moonlight shining through the curtain lace
Paints a perfect picture on your perfect face
One sweet angel sleeping in my arms
You are the promise I knew God would keep
You are the gift that makes my world complete

And you'll never know how much I love you
But I'll keep on telling you my whole life through
Now I believe in miracles, and you're the reason why
So dream on while I sing you my angel's lullaby

~Reba M.

Hello Tooth Fairy!

2010-02-16T07:34:00.000-08:00

The news is in and it's BIG! We have tooth! It's got to be a tooth unless my baby is half baby half T-Rex cuz that thing is sharp! Do T-Rexs' have sharp bottom teeth? I assume they do.
Good thing I no longer BF because I would probably not have nipples if I was.

It began one cranky runny nosed Thursday last week. Me getting over a cold and my husband getting over a stomach bug I figured Miss E had unfortunately got a cold from my snotty hands. I washed and washed, but you know it's hard to wash your hands 24/7 when lil' bebe starts a callin'.

She was one big crabby bebe beetch. Sorry E, but you were. I mean it was an awful day for us both. I felt like crap and so did you so we weren't very good company. But I held you all day and you slept for the most part and were so sweet snuggled up to Momma. The following days got better and I never thought to look in your mouth. You didn't have a fever just cranky and a slight runny nose and dirty diaper. I should have known.

Fast Forward to Valentine's weekend and I was getting her ready for bed at Grammy's and G Orr's. She was talking to me. She said, "Momma, I had a lovely day and I'm ready for bed but this shard of glass in my gums hurts." So I felt around on the top of her bebe gums. There was the shard of glass (ok, it was the tip of a tooth). I told her I could not take it out but it would be better soon and then someday the tooth fairy will bring her money for her bebe teeth when she gets her big teeth like Momma. That freaked her out. She said, "Someone called a fairy comes and takes my teeth and gives me money for it? Do we live in a third world country?" I said, "No, we live in Texas and here in Texas your little bebe teeth fall out and you grow big adult teeth so that you can gnaw on jerky, chew tobacky and whistle for your lil' doggies. And the fairy brings you monies for these lil' bebe teeth so you can buy the jerky and tobacky."

My little girl is growing up.

All I can hope for is that she doesn't read this blog and think I condone the use of tobacky because I hate it when I see little girls spittin' tobacky juice.

Ticka Ticka Ticka....

2010-01-27T10:39:00.000-08:00

That is the sound I make when I tickle bebe E. Ticka Ticka Ticka, she laughs so I Ticka some more. She has most definitely found her voice. She lies in her bed most mornings at 6:30am and gets her grudge on. Meaning, she sounds like the dead Japanese lady who makes that scary noise on The Grudge. Who thought up that and who thought that would scare me? The sound never scared me, it was that weird slinking down the stairs creepily with a dead face thing she did. And who thought a pale face Japanese boy would be scary looking at you from the stairs? Also, who told Sarah Michelle Gellar she could act?

I'm off track as usual, sorry. But she loves to talk now. I say to her all day, "Momma...Dadda...Momma...Dadda...Momma...Momma...Momma" ...see where I'm going with this?

I think her first words will be "Previously on 24".

Jack Bauer can rescue me any day.

Ahhh...and it tastes so good.

2010-01-21T20:24:00.000-08:00

Momma, thanks for Sophie. She's the bees knees.

I miss bubble lips.

2010-01-19T11:56:00.000-08:00

That is what Wilson lovingly refers to our baby girl as, bubble lips. She likes to make spit bubbles and drool from head to toe. She's a train of drool. "Hop on the Spit Train. Next stop, Toe Town." See, it drops from her mouth to her toes.

Anyway, I miss that little drool face right now as I sit at my desk daydreaming about taking a little nap with her and just watching her grow. Sometimes I feel like she is growing up too fast and I'm missing out on something, even though I see her everyday and just work 2 days a week. Today I had to greet the nanny since Wilson was out of town (he leaves for work later than I do). It was hard. Real hard. I didn't think it would be. I think it was because usually I head out before Elizabeth wakes up or sees me and this time she watched me walk out the front door. Waving goodbye and telling her I love her and blowing her kisses. I felt horrible as I got in the car. But she didn't blink an eye, she smiled and watched me and was so happy. Which I am so thankful for. She is good with other people, she is not a clingy baby, but she is still 4 months so she hasn't hit that stage yet.

But something inside me wanted her to be sad. To need me. Not that I want my baby crying and screaming and kicking the floor for Momma, just a little reach out, a little "maaaaa...wwaaaaa". Nothing. I will always want her to need me, and I will always be there for her.

I want to go home and see her smile.

I'm waiting for you Momma!!

I hate frogs...

2010-01-13T13:42:00.000-08:00

Literally ... to tired ... to write. But I will!

I work 2 days a week. 2 days!!! that's nothing. It's a cakewalk compared to all those other jerks out in the workforce.

I think what's making it hard is I have to get up before 6am (if I can hear my alarm and make myself shlump out of bed) on my 2 days of work, plus get up the rest of the week early, sometimes the same time or earlier to either feed, rock, sing, bounce, whatever the girl wants at that ungodly hour of the night. I'm not complaining, I asked for it when I took that ovulation test and it gave us the green light. 3 weeks later I was with child and my sleepy fate was sealed.

What? It's 4am. You don't want to talk right now? Look at me, I'm bursting with gossip!

I've never been so tired in all my life. It's a tired like no other I have ever felt, sucking the awesome out of me. I dream of sleeping even when I'm asleep. Take last night, I slept horrible, waking up in a sweat, but not wanting to get out of bed or move the covers for fear she would know I was up and want to talk about it. I wake up in the middle of the night even when she doesn't, that's how light of a sleeper I am now. I lie awake in bed even while my husband feeds the baby or quiets her on those nights of the days I work...I think because I'm a mom and I can't relax enough to let someone else take care of her. It's her father dammit! Geez! Eh, it's normal I guess and annoying. My back is paying for it too, stressed and in constant knots.

I feel guilty sometimes for wanting to take a vacation. A sleep vacation. I don't dream of going out at night, taking in a movie or dinner (even though a dinner that doesn't involve holding a baby or watching someone else hold the baby would be nice). I dream of cold pretty beds with fluffy comforters, sleep till noon, breakfast in bed and naps....not in my house. It's too messy and full of dust and dog hair to relax.

I thought once I was able to stay home I could get something done around there for a change. Have some "me" time...I knew I would be tired, but I would be productive. But like so so so many people told me...babies are a 24/7 job and there is no "me" time, there is no sleeping, or cleaning time and you won't be home cooking glorious meals every night.
What happens is you try to do a load of laundry but the baby doesn't have that plan in store for you, she wants you to look at her, hold her, feed her...and she might let you walk away for 5 minutes, but the minute Momma gets right in the middle of a task she really can't leave to finish later...baby wants your attention again. She's a hot mess. A blazing mess of baby cuteness I can't help but run to when she calls out "maaaaaaa...waaaaaaa". Or when she's had enough of that damn spinnin' frog on her walker.

I should just blame the frog.

Golden Girls

2010-01-12T14:53:00.000-08:00

Ready for the winter storm. Or maybe just waiting for mom to stop taking pictures and get on with making me some milk, geez!

I have to admit it...my baby rocks! She's totally cuter than yours. Just kidding. Well, ok...just kidding. I mean, we all think our baby is the cutest thing since slice and bake cookies. Which I wish I was eating right now. mmmm, warm gooey cookies. Or cold raw dough. Either way I'd eat a whole roll, slap my fat ass on a couch and...wait, is that Salt and Pepper I hear. "Ooo baby baby, baby baby...ahhhh Push it!" Yes, it was. Sorry got sidetracked by my coworkers ring tone. Who chooses that as a ring tone, really? and he's a 50 year old man. Totally thrown by that.

So, I'd slap my fat ass on a couch and watch some Golden Girls reruns. Does anyone else love the Golden Girls like I do? I'm obsessed with them. Me and my two girlfriends have said that if one day we all end up alone when we are old we will move to Miami and drink coffee out on our lanai and thank each other for being a friend.

I'd rather be the dumb one. She's not a slut, a giant man or a small chihuahua. Look at me, I'm the Saint Olaf Butter Queen!

It comes on the Hallmark channel for like 5 hours in the morning and then for like 5 hours in the mid day on Lifetime and then on again at night for god knows how long....eeeeeEEEEEeee!!!
You could watch every episode ever made of these grannies in like a week. Or you could get a life.

But I'd much rather watch Rose make potato bacon and lettuce sandwiches, see Dorothy hit Rose with a newspaper, hear about Blanche's latest fling and watch Sophia carry her purse from the kitchen to the living room. They comfort me, like a cup of tea. Old musty tea, steeping in wrinkled laydee leaves. I can't wait to be old sometimes.

Eh, come to think of it, I'd rather spend it with my hubby than in a house in Miami with two horny old women. It's humid here, but that humidity in Miami can suck it.

No daughter of mine...

2010-01-08T13:57:00.000-08:00

I tried to reason with a 4 month old today. I told my daughter that under no circumstances is she to go and get pregnant at 16 and then have the aftermath taped for television.

I don't know what is more disturbing. That I'm watching this show Teen Mom on MTV, no, taping this show so I don't miss it, or that I am talking like an adult to my 4 month old and telling her about the dangers of teen pregnancy. It scares the crap outta of me. The TV show does, not talking birds and bees to my daughter. I think I'll be able to handle that when the time comes.

The show follows 4 teenage girls. Each girl has a unique experience giving birth (at 16 y'all) and raising their children. One gives hers up for adoption, a loss so great I don't know how she had the strength to do it. The other 3 kept their babies and each has a different (ridiculous) family structure, not one I am envious of . Each freak me out differently and I am so glad I never had to go through what these girls are having to go through. Raising a baby at 30 is hard. Raising a baby at 16 makes me want to kick balls. And that ain't easy when you're holding a baby.

Of course, she didn't listen to word I said. She laughed, drooled and slapped her knee.

Laughing at my teen pregnancy speech

Reaching new feet

2010-01-07T07:41:00.000-08:00

She's found her feet! Tiny toes and fingers stretching and reaching and vying for my attention. I'm watching little girl and I'm taking a picture!

"Dude, it's just feet."

It's more than just feet to me. When she first pooed I was thrilled and talked about it for days. Why is it that parents gush over our little ones bodily functions? I don't do a jig every time I relieve myself and then talk about it's color and how many times a day I went, throw a party and mark it on my calendar as the Great Poop of 2010. I do however marvel at the fact that Liz can sometimes poop once a day, every other day or twice a day. Why? Why not just everyday. She likes to switch things up I guess and keep us on our toes.

Toes. Oh, right, back to the feet.

Those feet that kicked my uterine wall, jumped up and down on my bladder, played footsie with my spine...are now in her mouth.

She's simply amazing!

This one...

2010-01-06T09:04:00.001-08:00

This cute little giraffe. This soft sweet baby giraffe that I must have. Her name is Sophie and she's by Vulli. "I have to buy this now!", I scream with delight.
My daughter will be teething soon and as I sit here and stare at its cuteness on Amazon.com, I'm tempted to buy 2 because the first one might a) not make it to my front door through the fine US Mail, b) deflate on the way here, c) the mailman might feel the need to take Sophie for ransom due to her cuteness, or d) the dogs might get to her and chew her ear off. D is the most likely outcome. I click "Add to Shopping Cart".
Sophie is not just a teether, she is so much more. She is my whip to my cream, my a la mode to my pie, my chocolate chip to my cookie...my fat to my ass. She is all that and more and I know it will become Liz's favorite toy. Right? If I love it that much, she will too. She will. SHE WILL!

Ok, she might hate the damn thing. She might put it to her baby lips, gum it and throw it to the floor. I'll fall to the ground to rescue Sophie and Liz will just laugh her evil baby laugh which mostly involves a fake cough. She is a faker, that baby is. She'll raise her no haired eyebrows and smile, stick her little turtle neck out and shoot Sophie the finger.

See Elizabeth here, right before she flipped off the driver who cut in front of us.
He had it coming, he just didn't know know how cute it would be.

Damn that baby is a genius! She's only 4 months. I know, right. She could be applying for scholarships but I have her on a strict routine. Eat, play, sleep, eat, stare at dog... So maybe next month.
With 420 reviews on Amazon, all positive, this friggin' toy better step up when it hits my mailbox or heads will roll. Will ROLL!